Christmas time has the highest divorce rate throughout the entire year and when you think about it, it is easy to understand why. We spend time driving to see people we don’t really like, we over spend on the smallest of things, worry about what we can and cannot afford and generally don’t want to disappoint anyone, and someone always ends up disappointed.

When asked, “what does money mean to you”, the common answers are freedom and happiness. But what does it really mean? Relationships and money are not always best friends. The perceived power of money often complicates things in relationships. Who earns more, who spends more and who wants more. The answers cause conflict and often end in divorce especially when compounded with other things.

As Tony Robbins once said, “Nothing in life has any meaning except the meaning you give it”, meaning, money has no meaning. So if that’s the case, why are relationships and money the basis of so much trouble?

So consider this, what does money mean to you? Does it mean love; expensive presents mean I am loved and I will love more. Does it mean self-worth; if I have an abundance of money I am someone. Does it mean survival; it pays for my food and pays for my roof and four walls around me.

When you truly understand what money means to you your current relationship with money will start to change and you can address the incongruence. Although, it is always easier to blame the lack of money, isn’t it?

Depression, divorce, suicide, terminal illnesses etc still catch up with those that have an abundance of money. No one person is singled out and those lucky enough to win the lotto are not all of a sudden sustainably happier. Research shows that those who win the lotto are almost miserable. Instant expectations and having to keep up with those Jones’ cause just as many problems.

So the next time you disagree on money with your loved ones, think about what money means to you and what the real disagreement is about. You might find it has nothing to do with money at all.